Dear Feminists,
Dear Feminists,
“The fairytale is dead,” you say. At least that’s what Yahoo tells me when I go to check my email and see that an all-girls school is advertising to incoming freshmen through anti-princess propaganda. In a way, I agree.
We’re closing in on 2014 and after growing up watching the Powerpuff Girls save Townsville, hearing the Spice Girls shout “girl power!” everywhere they go, and seeing Barbie swap out her ball gown for a blazer, I get it. The thought that you can wait around for a man to take care of you is outdated and unrealistic. So the feminists have made their point: we can do anything.
But what if what I want to do is what they’ve been fighting so hard to break out of? I get the message that the anti-princess academy is trying to send, but what if they’re putting other women down in the process?
Maybe I like the idea of being a princess. Maybe my wish to stay home and cook and sew isn’t because of years of stereotypes and male dominance, but because that’s what I honestly and genuinely want to do. I want to do my hair, put on some makeup, and go shopping with friends. When I get home, I want to head straight to my kitchen and cook a nice dinner. I want to be a mom. And not a high-achieving-sorry-for-not-making-the-game-I-was-working kind of mom. I want to be the mom that packs your lunch, kisses your cheek, and is there on time to pick you up mom.
Which way is better? The way I see it, either way works. If you feel like you have something to prove, go prove it. Take on the world one battle at a time until you think you’ve achieved enough to sit back and pat yourself on the back for beating your male co-worker to the big promotion you’ve been killing yourself over.
And yes, discrimination is bad. Yes, you can do anything you want. No, you shouldn’t let any man tell you what to do. But remember that the whole point of feminism is that women are capable of doing whatever they want.
In my opinion, any mom out there who chooses to stay home and raise their children rather than hire a nanny while they fight to be the next CEO is fulfilling this expectation just fine. Girls need to know that it’s okay to be smart and pretty. It’s okay to work hard and stay home. Most importantly, they need to know how to make whatever they want a reality.
For some girls, this means growing up, getting tough, and being the boss. For others, its working part time while being a mom, wife or friend full time. So thank you to all the feminists who have fought so hard. We hear you. We can be anything we want. So let us.
Kristin • Nov 20, 2013 at 2:37 pm
There is a difference between second wave and third wave feminism and I suggest you look it up.
Intersectional Feminist!! • Nov 19, 2013 at 9:26 pm
okay okay sorry im commenting again but i just saw this and i thought it fit the situation pretty well??
– ” I enjoy the ideas of traditional gender roles as long as it’s not to an extreme. I would love to be a stay at home mom, cooking, baking, and cleaning, taking care of my son, and having everything nice and ready for when my husband comes home from work. It would just need to be acknowledged that, yeah I was home all day, but I was busy, and it wasn’t easy, and I would like respect and appreciation for my efforts. That I am choosing to do. Because yeah, it’s awesome that today that’s not a women’s only option, because it’s not for every women, and they feel more fulfilled being in a workplace with a successful career, and good for them.
Though if it makes me happy to choose to be a SAHM, and cater to my husband, and families needs first I want respect for that, because it’s not my only option, it’s my choice. I could easy get a job, and pay for daycare, but I would rather it be me who takes care of my son. I could easily hire a house keeper to come in every once in a while because I’m working and I need an extra hand cleaning, but I would rather be home and do it all myself.
So despite all the arguing that has gone on because of this imagine.
There is no shame in wanting a lifestyle that reinforces traditional gender roles.
There is no shame in wanting a lifestyle that is more modern and progressive.
The only shame is when you shame another person for choosing to live their life in a way that suits their personal preferences. ”
okay I’m officially done pestering!
Intersectional Feminist!! • Nov 19, 2013 at 9:03 pm
YOOOO! I so agree. Being a feminist, I’ve heard so many arguments like this. I’m just gunna say – This is also what what feminism is fighting FOR. We want ladies to stay home and be awesome moms! We want them to pack our future generations lunch boxes and make dinner for their family. We want you to do your hair and make-up! Trust me – we want this, if you want this. You wanna stay home? Cool, we want you to too, as long as that’s what YOU WANT!!
What we’re fighting for is equal rights. We want you, to be able to stay at home, but also to be able kick butt in an awesome CEO office. We want you to be able to CHOOSE. That’s what feminists are fighting for! All we want is equal rights and respect. We’re fighting so that the woman cooking dinner for her family is just as respected as the woman managing a business. That’s really all. Choice. To be able to do both or pick between the two and still be seen as respectable.
I promise – that radical image of feminists burning bras or whatever is just a load of crap. (I mean, some do, I guess. . . but that’s a select few groups, I guess. . .) I myself am I feminist (duh,obviously) and I just wanted to say that I approve of your wants. Not many woman get to be stay at home moms, and I think it’s fab that you want do that. I personally want to a business owner of a small shop, which I think is pretty cool too? Don’t you think we deserve the same respect, you and I? I mean, we’re just living life being awesome ladies, right?