If you steal a clean slate, does it go on your record?
Surfer: I don’t think I have enough room on my record.
Skater: I guess not, no.

Surfer, what are you trying to say? Are you suggesting that you have been up to no good? Is this really the time or the place? I mean, as a senior you are graduating soon and will be looking for new life opportunities and jobs and the like. What if a copy of this paper gets into the hands of THE POPO? Don’t they look first to San Dieguito Academy’s kind-of-monthly student newspaper, The Mustang, for all the newest updates and most hard-hitting local news stories? Don’t all the talent agents spend late nights exploring the bowels of sdamustang.com for the next major writer/Bachelorette based solely on her really quite unique sense of humor and beauty as indicated by her sharp wit? What if these important future-determining people were to see that you are maybe implying that your slate is DIRTY? What then? GAME OVER, Surfer! Future ruined. Plus 20 points because I pity you and fear that you will have NOTHING ELSE once the masses read your answer.
Skater, I like that you appear to be really thinking about your answer. You say “I guess” as if you are really letting this marinate in your head. Who really cares about the slate and the stealing and what not, when we have you to offer up such nice, ambiguous sentence fragments? What a rare and candid look at humanity. Plus 60 points for that neat little piece of poetry. One more syllable and you’d have one line of a haiku!

When people lose weight, where does it go?
Surfer: It goes into the good vibes.
Skater: It evaporates within your body.

Skater, I’m no science major (thank God, or Einstein or Isaac Newton or whatever. Why would I go into such an irrelevant and bewildering field?), but I’m intellectual enough to know that your answer is probably incorrect. It “evaporates within your body”? Correct me if I’m wrong (just kidding, this is a newspaper article so everything I say is completely accurate no matter what), but doesn’t “evaporate” mean to turn from liquid to vapor, according to the first definition that came up when I [the] Googled it? (Somehow this still means nothing to me. I mean, I get it but I don’t get it, you know?) So, as you say, the vapor would go within your body. Where then? Where??? I don’t really want to think about it, actually, so minus 100 points for being more inept at science than me (that’s saying something. That’s an honor, really.)
Surfer, what good vibes? Are there any? Cause I’m not feeling them right now. As you may have recently discovered, I am at least semi-decent at what most people would like to call “Science”, and as such I think I can say with unjustifiable confidence that “vibes” are not tangible, and therefore the weight would not go into those, either. I can’t say I’m not disappointed, Surfer. Minus 70 points for not being able to answer one of my most pressing questions (second only to “Why am I so pretty?”).

Surfer: -50 Skater: -40
Yay Skater! You win nothing.