Prince of Persia…32%

Almost Anti-Oscar:

Furry Vengeance…25%

The Bounty Hunter…21%

Killers…13%

Life As We Know It…9%

For a movie based on a seven-year-old video game, “Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time” is remarkably poetic. The film lends itself to heart-wrenching symbolism, as the protagonist Dastan, portrayed by Jake Gyllenhaal, is thrust into a world where family becomes foe and the fabric that holds together time and reality is tested.

No, I’m just kidding. “Prince of Persia” was voted the “anti-Oscar” this year by SDA students, and very rightly so.

The movie follows Dastan in his quest to protect the Dagger of Time after he is blamed for the murder of his father, the king. Dastan, flees with Princess Tamina, who is (extremely predictably) to become his love interest. The Dagger of Time, which, surprisingly, can control time, is the target of desire for Dastan’s villainous uncle Nizam, who is revealed to be the true murderer of the king. This is starting to sound like “The Lion King!”

Despite its convoluted plot, “Prince of Persia” manages to be extremely bland, with little substance. The movie, which is made by Jerry Bruckheimer Films, the same studio that created the “Pirates of the Caribbean” saga, has none of the energy and likeable characters that were present in “Pirates.”

At the same time, it was surprising to see Gyllenhaal, whose performance in “Brokeback Mountain” had Oscar potential, acting in a film on the other side of the spectrum. It will be no surprise if “Prince of Persia” racks up quite a few Razzie awards.

But to be fair, were we really expecting much from a movie based on an outdated video game?